justwrite 3 january

If I wake up earlier I will take up a cup full of morning the lips clouds the warm heat and the sleep washes away

if I wake up asleep I will take the eggs and crack them like windows to the day scattering sunshine wet across the fryingpan sky

if I wake up tired I will fire all the cannons and salute the gunners on the unemployment line taking their time before they make their next moves grooving to record sales and record breaking infrastructure conjectures on how to build a new economy

if I wake up after the time has passed to be elsewhere I will giggle into my pillow and shrug into the wallpaper apologize to the floorboards and shake my head at the windowsill

if I wake up angry at the confusion of my dreams I will taste green pen in my notebook and see what’s cooked up between the blue and black ink of my days

if I wake up lonely I will fry potatoes and as they sizzle and crackle I will run laps around this city keeping my sneakers clean and my head above ground

if I wake up with a headache as is sometimes the case I will go back to sleep through cottoncloud chocolatehaze the dark sicksweet kind of indulgence which is the only way to handle is the only candle to hold to disappointed plans this is all I can do and working through means not working

if I wake up embarrassed it will not be the first time I’ve counted my shoestrings before tripping out the door and into the public light the spot too bright for my taste and the waste too watered down to matter in these circumstances as the dances go on and I am second-guessing lies and the over-tightened ties of the mistakes I am still making

if I wake up taking a deep breath I am hoping to see Christmas lights in the cross-courtyard windows left inexplicably on and into the wrong season there are reasons in other countries but I prefer to see delay as a purposeful rejection of the over-rushed affection for movingfast hurryingpast each scheduled occasion for this is a nation of sitters and eaters but also of doers and greeters and dancers and thinkers of laughers and drinkers

if I wake up and I am thirsty I will wonder about tea and two kinds of honey and for my money there’s only one and it’s not sugar but if there’s a fir tree without a star and I twinkle wondering where you are I will wake up with eyes of blue and dream they’ve turned to green