post 17 october

Justwrite 17 october

Need to breathe a different air this one compares favorably with the other draft I crafted a raft out of paper and I floated it upstream we dreamed too much yesterday and the weather fell apart I started to tell you something but you took out your protractor and I was distracted by all the angles I tried and you dangled the degrees in a mathy breeze and I sneezed not in a haughty way but in the kind of direction where you’re teaching a lesson in letting yourself feel things truly I had unruly dreams last night and my notebook lost its lines the green letters littered all over the floor what’s more we have less than we started with

Justwrite 16 october

When I think I’ll need to write a draft first I pull out my boots and wander in setting the scene with brackets and wonder and this is such a time this avoidance of rhyme and intrigue to breathe big and open out to air the doubts because what if and why not and I liked the way we moved thataway but today there’s a spider in the corner and it has no name no face just doubt and clouded lenses I’d rather be clear for there’s no fear in being alone if you’ve grown used to do it the truth’s a bit more complicated than you’ll admit—but I probably won’t put that in the final copy

justwrite 13 october

Today the black pants// I thought yesterday but avoided narrowly the wide legs today they swallowed me I shouldered this burden for the season// I who put on these pants and there are three pairs I am overaware of the ill-fitting the bagginess sitting itself down even while I stand and so now I know lo the passing of time the buy-in to crime the conspiracy of weather and dough growing into fitting and even too-tight-getting stretched out the uneasy doubts of seeing the line the pair stretching out aware through the snow soon to think through the calendar and sink with my hope dragged my rope and carbohydrates it easy-breaks my heart but jeans won’t do and the skirts are not right either// running from and growing into